6 BIGGEST MISTAKES WE MAKE IN THE BEGINNING OF A RELATIONSHIP

(1) WE DON'T ASK ENOUGH QUESTIONS

The more information you have about someone, the better you'll be able to judge whether or not this person will make a good mate. The less information you have about someone, the more likely you will end up angry, disappointed or heartbroken.

Ask about these areas:

• family background and quality of family relationships
• past love relationships and reasons for breakups
• lessons learned from life experiences
• ethics, values and morals
• attitudes about love, commitment, communication
• spiritual or religious philosophy
• personal and professional goals

(2) WE IGNORE WARNING SIGNS OF POTENTIAL PROBLEMS

Ironically, the more positive and loving a person you are, the more prone you may be to ignoring the warning signs in your relationships. Even if you notice something about your partner that should signal you to be cautious, but you choose, consciously or unconsciously, to ignore it by:

• minimizing its importance
• making excuses for the other person
• rationalizing
• denying it

(3) WE MAKE PREMATURE COMPROMISES

The danger in premature compromise is that you lose your sense of self early in the relationship and create a false sense of harmony between you and your mate.

Reasons you do this:

• to create some kind of compatibility.
• because you are desperate to be loved and accepted by your new partner and to make the relationship work

(4) WE GIVE IN TO LUST BLINDNESS

When you learn to feel people with your heart and not just see them with your eyes, you will attract much more compatible partners into your life.

If you are a woman, you should ask yourself:

• Would I want to have this man's children?
• Would I want a son just like this man?

If you're a man, you should ask yourself:

• Would I want this woman to be the mother of my children?
• Would I want a daughter just like this woman?

(5) WE GIVE IN TO MATERIAL SEDUCTION

When you choose a partner based on what he can offer you materially rather than what he can offer you emotionally, you will end up in the wrong relationship. Avoid being influenced by a person's:

• money
• lifestyle
• appearance
• power
• career
• reputation

(6) WE PUT COMMITMENT BEFORE COMPATIBILITY

You may be prone to this mistake if you:

• like being a part of a couple much more than you like being single
• are tired of dating and trying out new partners and long to settle down
• felt unloved or abandoned as a child
• feel lost when you are not in a relationship
• feel pressured by others to find a partner
• are a woman and feel your biological clock is running out
• are the only one of your group of friends who still isn't married
• have a lonely inner child who desperately wants to feel loved and belonging to someone
• are very idealistic and find it easy to see what is lovable in people